Supplements and Butt Ruptures
19/07/10 14:49
I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while now. I’ve written it so many times, to separate individuals, it will save me some time, I figure, to just put it down in a blog post so that everyone can read it at once, and I don’t have to keep repeating myself to individuals.
I’ll start out by telling you a story—
I used to be a weightlifter. Not in any professional capacity, but I lifted weights to stay in shape. I believe in hard work, but I also believe in efficiency, so of course, before I began to lift weights, I studied the biochemistry of the cells comprising muscle tissue. And, obviously, I had to make a study of the processes by which ATP was produced and used by the cells. And, then, I studied, of course, the fuel itself: protein, fat, and carbohydrates.
I formed an opinion, as most weightlifters do, that carbs make you fat. You eat carbs, they turn into glucose, insulin is produced to pick up that glucose, and then it is stored in your cells as fat. I wanted muscle, not fat.
But, after cutting carbs to the bare minimum, I began to crave them. Believing in the adage, “better living through chemistry,” I began to look for a method by which I could eat carbs and not process them as fat.
When you read articles on this topic, you come across loads of crap products on the internet; with cute little names, like “Carb Busters, Carb Blockers,” and “Carb Blasters,” etc. It’s always amazing to me the load of bullshit that people will buy.
These articles always start out the same way. First, they tell you that they’ve obtained some breakthrough scientific product that is “all natural.” That’s supposed to make you feel safe about taking the product. Then, they start quoting little snippets from real scientific articles about the main ingredient in their product. That ingredient usually has a long, scientific name, but it always comes from a “natural” source in which dedicated scientists with large foreheads have just recently managed to discern miraculous properties.
And the articles they cite are real. The studies have been done. The results are in. That’s supposed to make you feel like you’re making an informed decision.
If you stop at this point and buy the product, you’re a fool.
Because, first, the product that they are selling has very little of the ingredient mentioned in the article. In fact, often, these products only have trace amounts of the ingredient in them. And, often, they have none of the ingredient at all.
Now, this one particular product that I found, that was supposed to block the absorption of carbohydrates, supposedly had one of these miraculous ingredients in it. I don’t remember the name of the product, or even the name of the miraculous ingredient anymore. But it did come from a natural source; I believe it was a type of lima beans. I do not like lima beans, but even if I did, I wanted the name of that chemical.
But first, I read the articles that were cited in the sales pitch. This “carb blocker” ingredient had been tested in mice. It did, indeed, block carbs.
Was it a good thing to block carbs? No. Because if you used enough of that miraculous ingredient on those poor mice, it blocked the carbs so well that they ruptured their anuses. That miraculous ingredient gave them mice butt ruptures.
Now, fortunately, this “carb blocker” didn’t have enough of that natural ingredient, probably, to rupture any weightlifters’ butts. It was, most probably, ground up lima beans that they were selling for $40 a pop, so to speak. Heh.
The moral of this story is to watch out for supplements. This industry is almost completely unregulated. Know what you’re buying. Always look for the amount of the main ingredient, as tested by some accepted measure, such as HPLC (high performance liquid chromatography). Read the articles. Do your homework before you go putting just any old crap into your body.
Butt ruptures are not pretty, you know.
I’ll start out by telling you a story—
I used to be a weightlifter. Not in any professional capacity, but I lifted weights to stay in shape. I believe in hard work, but I also believe in efficiency, so of course, before I began to lift weights, I studied the biochemistry of the cells comprising muscle tissue. And, obviously, I had to make a study of the processes by which ATP was produced and used by the cells. And, then, I studied, of course, the fuel itself: protein, fat, and carbohydrates.
I formed an opinion, as most weightlifters do, that carbs make you fat. You eat carbs, they turn into glucose, insulin is produced to pick up that glucose, and then it is stored in your cells as fat. I wanted muscle, not fat.
But, after cutting carbs to the bare minimum, I began to crave them. Believing in the adage, “better living through chemistry,” I began to look for a method by which I could eat carbs and not process them as fat.
When you read articles on this topic, you come across loads of crap products on the internet; with cute little names, like “Carb Busters, Carb Blockers,” and “Carb Blasters,” etc. It’s always amazing to me the load of bullshit that people will buy.
These articles always start out the same way. First, they tell you that they’ve obtained some breakthrough scientific product that is “all natural.” That’s supposed to make you feel safe about taking the product. Then, they start quoting little snippets from real scientific articles about the main ingredient in their product. That ingredient usually has a long, scientific name, but it always comes from a “natural” source in which dedicated scientists with large foreheads have just recently managed to discern miraculous properties.
And the articles they cite are real. The studies have been done. The results are in. That’s supposed to make you feel like you’re making an informed decision.
If you stop at this point and buy the product, you’re a fool.
Because, first, the product that they are selling has very little of the ingredient mentioned in the article. In fact, often, these products only have trace amounts of the ingredient in them. And, often, they have none of the ingredient at all.
Now, this one particular product that I found, that was supposed to block the absorption of carbohydrates, supposedly had one of these miraculous ingredients in it. I don’t remember the name of the product, or even the name of the miraculous ingredient anymore. But it did come from a natural source; I believe it was a type of lima beans. I do not like lima beans, but even if I did, I wanted the name of that chemical.
But first, I read the articles that were cited in the sales pitch. This “carb blocker” ingredient had been tested in mice. It did, indeed, block carbs.
Was it a good thing to block carbs? No. Because if you used enough of that miraculous ingredient on those poor mice, it blocked the carbs so well that they ruptured their anuses. That miraculous ingredient gave them mice butt ruptures.
Now, fortunately, this “carb blocker” didn’t have enough of that natural ingredient, probably, to rupture any weightlifters’ butts. It was, most probably, ground up lima beans that they were selling for $40 a pop, so to speak. Heh.
The moral of this story is to watch out for supplements. This industry is almost completely unregulated. Know what you’re buying. Always look for the amount of the main ingredient, as tested by some accepted measure, such as HPLC (high performance liquid chromatography). Read the articles. Do your homework before you go putting just any old crap into your body.
Butt ruptures are not pretty, you know.